In the UK, there was a BBC television quiz programme called Mastermind, where the quizmaster used to say ‘I’ve started so I’ll finish’ if the buzzer, signalling the end of a round, sounded mid-way through a question.
I’ve applied that principle to some ideas and goals I have.
For those of you interested in Belbin, I have a strong preference for the ‘Completer Finisher’ role. If I start something, I like to see it through to the end. This can be quite a useful attribute to have but I am guilty of taking it to extremes.
I’ve learnt that unachievable ideas, goals where I’ve been too influenced by someone else or mindsets that no longer align with where I want to be, need to be de-cluttered.
It’s not just about the physical clutter or the digital clutter – and don’t even start me on emotional clutter! That’s a whole blog post in itself.
But goals, ideas, thoughts, even projects – these can do with a regular overhaul as well.
I stopped a project some time ago and a familiar feeling descended. I recognised it, I wanted to greet it, but I couldn’t place it for a moment. Then it came to me. Guilt.
That guilty feeling I used (used!) to feel when de-cluttering. A feeling of inadequacy because I didn’t utilise an item the way I felt I should have.
But that was then and this is now. I’ve de-cluttered guilt along the way as well. I gave myself permission to abandon the project, the way I gave myself permission to clear out my wardrobe.
I don’t always have to finish what I start. There isn’t someone with a clipboard walking around keeping score of what I’ve finished and what I’ve discarded.
It’s harder to de-clutter work and ideas but just as necessary.
Have a great week 😊
Minimal-Lol 
I so get the guilt of not making good use of an item. ‘Waste not want not’ was a constant comment growing up. Decluttering and giving items new life in a new home has helped me with this ☺️xx
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Hiya Nik, that mindset helps me enormously too. Being able to gift, donate or re-purpose an item helps assuage the guilt of having it in the first place. My rationale these days is I would rather gift or donate an item for someone else to have value in it, rather than replace it in a dark cupboard and not use it myself! Lxx
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Thanks for sharing these wonderful reflections on decluttering feelings of guilt, Lorraine! This is really interesting. I think guilt can be one of the most uncomfortable feelings to confront. I am much the same when it comes to seeing something through to the end, and it’s hard to escape from that instinct. It can be a great characteristic at times, as you say, but there’s a lot of danger in it, too! I used to absolutely force myself to see everything through from start to finish, even books that from page one didn’t do anything for me. Now if a book, an idea, or whatever, isn’t working from me, I really try to make an effort to just leave it. To decide that it’s ok to leave it unfinished and move on to something more interesting/productive/valuable. I like it how you say that there isn’t someone walking around with a clipboard tallying up everything we do into ‘finished’ and ‘unfinished’. My realisation is that there has been someone walking around with a clipboard doing all that tallying, but, alas, it was me. 😊
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Hi lovely Lisa, thanks so much for the great comment, as always! You make some really interesting points but my favourite was your last one. The person keeping tally with the clipboard, alas, was also me!! I seemed to think there was someone peering over my shoulder, marking me up or down, depending how well I was doing – and not just at various projects – but at life! We are sometimes our own worst enemies! So true Lisa. Oh, it’s so great to have you back ❤ Lxx
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It’s true, isn’t it – we really can be our own worst enemies sometimes! And it’s so great to be back, Lorraine! ❤ 🙂 xx
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Bravo! It’s like starting a book and thinking we have to finish it when it really just doesn’t suit us. I’ve reversed the guilt to a feeling of accomplishment that I have freed up time I might have wasted. In interior design, and architecture, we often stop cold when something isn’t exciting us and we are plodding thru it. That does not serve us, or our clients very well and letting go is often the best way to let something else in. Great thought provoking post!
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Oh I like that approach, Laurel – we haven’t lost something, we’ve gained time instead! I always love your upbeat attitude ❤ Lxx
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I love this (you’ve managed to pre-empt a future blog post of mine about emotional decluttering!). It’s so good that you’re able to understand and reflect on what you’re feeling – I think so often we experience guilt without naming it or questioning it. Of course you have nothing to feel guilty about – as you say, you’re allowed to choose what you do, but there’s often a part of us saying “that’s not good enough” that’s worth challenging. Wonderful post, thanks, Lol, hope you’re having a good weekend.
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Hi Julie, thanks as always for the warm and supportive comments. Yes, the ‘that’s not good enough’ feeling is a hard one to let go of, even when it clearly is serving no purpose. It took me far longer to recognise the guilt in situations like this but as you rightly say, the first step is to name and challenge it, rather than just succumbing. Enjoy the rest of your weekend, Lxx
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I also enjoyed the Mastermind reference 👍😊💪
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An oldie but a goodie!!! Lxx
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